Chain letters and snoring dogs
I wonder if God believes in chain letters.
If he doesn’t, then I’m going to be OK because I just broke one.
If he does, then I had better brace myself for 365 days of bad luck.
I mean he’s the only one who is going to know I just killed one out of my “inbox” this morning. (Well, the snoring dog was also somewhat of an eyewitness. I let her out a few minutes ago, but she started scratching on the back door so I let her in. She’s already fast asleep on the old comforter in the corner of my study.)
A neighbor sent us one of those silly chain e-mails. Technology sure has made it easier to perpetuate these kinds of superstitions. In the old days, you had to make copies, put them in an envelope and invest in a stamp. Now, all you have to do is forward it to everyone in your e-mailbox and you will miraculously avoid coming down with the bubonic plague and 212 other curses.
I sure hope God doesn’t believe in chain letters because this one came with a direct threat. If I delete it, I will have one year of bad luck. But, if I send it to at least two friends, I will be rewarded with up to three years of good luck.
Procrastination does not pay, either. The letter says if I send it to everyone I know within the next hour, I will be granted one wish that will come true within the next year.
There is a timetable for others, too. If I send it to three people, I will get what I want in six months. If I send it to six people, I only have to wait one month. If 15 people get it within the next hour, my wish will come true. Should I be very efficient and send it to 20 people, I’ll get what I want in three hours.
Shoot, I could be a millionaire shortly after breakfast.
But I won’t. I just sent it to the “delete” folder. It's on the scrap pile and in the garbage.
Something tells me God doesn’t believe in chain letters, anyway.
I just took a vote and neither does the snoring dog.
I wonder if God believes in chain letters.
If he doesn’t, then I’m going to be OK because I just broke one.
If he does, then I had better brace myself for 365 days of bad luck.
I mean he’s the only one who is going to know I just killed one out of my “inbox” this morning. (Well, the snoring dog was also somewhat of an eyewitness. I let her out a few minutes ago, but she started scratching on the back door so I let her in. She’s already fast asleep on the old comforter in the corner of my study.)
A neighbor sent us one of those silly chain e-mails. Technology sure has made it easier to perpetuate these kinds of superstitions. In the old days, you had to make copies, put them in an envelope and invest in a stamp. Now, all you have to do is forward it to everyone in your e-mailbox and you will miraculously avoid coming down with the bubonic plague and 212 other curses.
I sure hope God doesn’t believe in chain letters because this one came with a direct threat. If I delete it, I will have one year of bad luck. But, if I send it to at least two friends, I will be rewarded with up to three years of good luck.
Procrastination does not pay, either. The letter says if I send it to everyone I know within the next hour, I will be granted one wish that will come true within the next year.
There is a timetable for others, too. If I send it to three people, I will get what I want in six months. If I send it to six people, I only have to wait one month. If 15 people get it within the next hour, my wish will come true. Should I be very efficient and send it to 20 people, I’ll get what I want in three hours.
Shoot, I could be a millionaire shortly after breakfast.
But I won’t. I just sent it to the “delete” folder. It's on the scrap pile and in the garbage.
Something tells me God doesn’t believe in chain letters, anyway.
I just took a vote and neither does the snoring dog.
posted by Ed Grisamore at 5:47 AM
2 Comments:
I've read your new blog daily and have enjoyed everyone. Regarding yesterday's thoughts, my thought after scrolling down to your son's picture is that "the (peach) doesn't fall far from the tree." He's a neat kid.
Just a reminder . . . keep those beloved pets inside during the coming holiday week if fireworks are around. We don't want to hear of any other plump, old dogs jumping any fences. And by the way, Bailey doesn't believe in chain letters either. :)
Happy 4th,
Claire Angle
Somehow I doubt God believes in chain letters, I think they are something sent from the devil himself.
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