Welcome to my couch

Things I don’t think I’ll be able to figure out before the end of the day:

• What would Elvis would look like if he were still alive today at age 71? My goodness. He looked like he was 71 when he 42.
• Who will be Georgia’s starting quarterback? The Bulldawg Nation can't sleep at night.
• Why would someone steal 216 pounds of catfood? Is that what they do for entertainment out in Lizella?
• How did those “snakes on a plane” make it through airport security? And did the airline ended up losing their luggage, too?
• Why can’t we get a grip on controlling the increasing number of panhandlers downtown? It’s the worst I’ve ever seen it. They’re going to drive law-abiding folks away, and our city is going to look like a Krispy Kreme doughnut – a big hole in the middle.
• How could any restaurant get a score below 70 from the food inspectors? What’s going on back there in the kitchen?
• How can it rain all around my neighborhood but somehow miss my house?
• Why do people shop for everything at the superstores? Too big. Too impersonal. Excuse me, but I’ll take my business somewhere else. I don’t mind paying a little more to get personal service and a salesperson who knows what they’re talking about.
• How did Cynthia McKinney get elected in the first place? The gods must be crazy.
• Why am I running this photo of a freckle-faced Jake, taken two years ago, sticking his tongue out at me?